What is the Bird Theory test on TikTok? All about the viral relationship trend among couples

The Bird Theory, also called the 'bird test', is a TikTok trend that originated two years ago, but recently resurfaced on the platform. Simply put, it's a short and swift experiment to assess how much one's romantic partner is invested in them.

To test it out, an individual has to pretend to see something regular and ordinary, such as a bird, and exclaim at it in an attempt to get their partner's attention. If the said partner reacts to the person with a certain level of enthusiasm, curiosity, or excitement, they pass the test.

However, if the partner fails to react or shrugs it off with indifference, they fail the bird test. In such cases, the one conducting the test might conclude their partner is not as emotionally invested in the relationship as they are expected to be.

This needs to send Asap

bird theory- $theory pic.twitter.com/YRNYAuzFAp

— T𝖚𝖗𝖓𝖊𝖗 (@thatboytimiyy) October 26, 2025

In October 2023, TikTok content creator @alyssacardib first posted a video where she said:

"I live and die by the f*cking bird test", adding, "it never fails."

Alyssa shared she did the test on almost everyone she met, including her family members and friends. She explained the bird theory test can measure the strength of an emotional or romantic connection between two people. The content creator further relayed how to do the test:

"If you're with someone, romantic or not, if you say something that could be deemed insignificant, and your partner responds with genuine curiosity, that's a really good sign that your relationship will last a long time."

On the other hand, Alyssa warned users that if their partner fails to acknowledge them or shows disinterest in the observation, that could be a "really bad sign".

The Bird theory trend resurfaces on social media

Recently, the bird theory has made a comeback on some users' timelines again. User @keketherealmrsjones shared glimpses of her life following a seemingly broken marriage on TikTok.

In one of the first videos in her documentation shared last week, Keke was trying to get her husband's attention as she affectionately kept leaning toward him.

Despite her attempts, the man not only did not budge, but went on to roll his eyes at her with a look of disgruntlement. Keke captioned the post:

"The day I realize Husband doesn't want me! I kept trying to get his attention. He looked at other girls like he was embarrassed of me."

Keke's post has gained over 56 million views so far, with many calling the video a perfect example of the viral bird theory.

So this is the “bird theory?” 🤔 pic.twitter.com/4caHaaPlsw

— Music is Life (@ArtOfMusic_) October 20, 2025

On the other hand, for user @donnyandserenity, the bird theory test went well. As she was walking with her partner in an open space, she suddenly pointed at one corner and told the other person that there was a bird. Her partner immediately looked at where she pointed, and when he didn't see a bird, he proceeded to look for it over his head.

Upon realizing there was no bird, the partner continued the banter and told her:

"You know I got chased by a raccoon yesterday?"

Soon, many other users jumped on the bandwagon and started filming their versions of the bird theory test with their partners.

TikTok's Bird Theory is what the Gottman Institute's 'bids' test follows

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This test is not just a TikTok trend that was born out of the blue, but it actually has a scientific backing. Dr. John Mordechai Gottman, psychologist and the founder of the Gottman Institute, conducted an experiment called, Turning Toward Instead of Away, on a group of newlyweds.

Dr. Gottman's research was to find out whether romantic partners can be on the same wavelength emotionally to enhance and strengthen their connection. He used "bids" as a significant factor here, defining it as "any attempt from one partner to another for attention, affirmation, affection, or any other positive connection".

According to Dr. Gottman's study, a bid can be a verbal communication or a nonverbal gesture. In a way, bids are an individual's attempt to reach out to their partners as they seek to form a connection.

Per Dr. Gottman's research, if partners tend to pay attention to one another in every significant as well as insignificant moments, it is a healthy sign, also referred to as "Turning Toward".

On the other hand, if an individual rejects their partner's gesture for affection or attention, it can be a worrying sign that poses questions about the relationship. This is what Dr. Gottman demonstrated as "Turning Away".

Although @alyssacardib, the originator of the TikTok bird theory, did not mention Gottman Institute's research, it can be established that the viral trend is not just a fad but has a psychological explanation.